For the Ones Who Stayed, and the One Who Couldn’t

Suraida M. Tinggoma finished Bachelor of Secondary Education major in Filipino during the 79th Commencement Exercises of the University of Southern Mindanao (USM) on June 27, 2025 at the University Auditorium, USM, Kabacan, Cotabato. The fifth of six children, Suraida owns an interesting life story that the USM community can ponder upon.

Raised by her mother, who farms and sells good in the market, Suraida did not had an easy journey in her college life. Her father had deep love for education, but for her, his time was short. He passed away in 2015. It was sudden that left an unhealed scar.

“Wala pong katulad ang tatay ko… hindi kami pinalo kahit kailan. Siya lang ang laging nagsasabi, mag-aral kayo, anak. ‘Yan lang ang maiiwan namin ng nanay niyo,” Suraida narrated.

According to Suraida, before her father died, he told them:“Magtulungan kayong magkakapatid. Hindi habang buhay, andito kami.”

It was that promise that Suraida carried through every year of college—when she thought about giving up, when she didn’t have any peso from home to USM, when she studied with a heavy heart.

During the interview, she admitted there were moments she nearly gave up. “May mga gabi talaga na umiiyak ako, kasi parang kahit anong kayod, kulang pa rin. Minsan iniisip ko, ‘Para kanino pa ba ‘to?’ Pero lagi kong binabalikan ‘yung sinabi ni Papa. At ‘yung mukha ni Mama. Kaya kahit mahirap, tinuloy ko,” she shared.

Due to his father’s demise, Suraida went on various side hustles for her family and for her needs in school. She once woke up at dawn to help her mother sell baskets, broom sticks, and fruits in the market. She washed dishes after class, worked as a house helper and as a waitress in a restaurant on weekends.

“Kapag wala pong klase, tumutulong ako kay Mama sa palengke, kahit anong maibenta, malaking bagay na. Minsan kahit pagod na, kailangan pa ring kumilos. Wala naman kaming ibang aasahan,” She shared in an interview.

But even as she took on side jobs to survive college, she kept much of her struggle to herself. “Hindi ko na sinabi kay Mama na nagtratrabaho ako bilang yaya o tagahugas ng pinggan. Ayokong isipin niyang nahihirapan ako. Ayokong dagdagan pa ‘yung iniisip niya,” she admitted quietly.

When graduation day finally came, Suraida didn’t feel complete. “Sobrang saya, pero may lungkot…may degree holder na sa pamilya namin, pero wala na si Papa para makita.” She imagines what it would have been like to hear his voice one more time: “Nak, proud ako sa’yo. Alam kong kaya mong tapusin ‘yan, kasi matapang ka.”

And she was. She had to be.

Now she stands at the edge of a new challenge: job applications, interviews, the pressure to provide. She doesn’t have all the answers. But she knows what she’s made of. She knows what she survived. And she knows that moving forward, no matter how uncertain, is something she’s already done a thousand times.

“Ang pag-aaral at pagtatrabaho ay hindi madali, pero ang bawat hirap at pagod ay may kapalit na tagumpay. Huwag kang sumuko sa iyong mga pangarap. Magpatuloy ka lang. Maging matatag at matibay, para sa mga pangarap mo, para sa pamilya mo, at para sa sarili mo,” Suraida spoke, addressing those who silently face life’s challenges like her.

Suraida’s story is not just of a student who graduated, it is a story of a daughter who kept a promise. A story of a young woman who faced the worst and chose to continue. As she took her walk to the stage, every step echoed with her father’s words, her mother’s strength, and the silent sacrifices of a family that never gave up.

While the USM Auditorium was filled with cheers and graduates with complete family members, Suraida faced her most awaited moment, her graduation gown pressed, and her steps counted. While counting, she remembered kneeling in a hospital hallway, begging for antibiotics they couldn’t afford — not for herself, but to save her father’s life. From there, she received her diploma, and then everything sinks in: she now earned a degree.

Suraida graduated not just for herself, but for the ones who stayed and the one who couldn’t.